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Divorce Aphorisms

To brighten your day we thought it would be fun to share some Divorce Aphorisms with you instead of just focusing on the nuts and bolts of what we do every day. Many of these aphorisms come from Huffington Post and Alessandra Stanley of the New York Times. If you're going through a divorce, have been through one or about to we think you'll relate.

1. Ah, yes, divorce from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet. –Robin Williams

2. My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money. –Wendy Liebman

3. Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left. –Jean Kerr

4. I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. –Zsa Zsa Gabor

5. His happiness is a small price to pay for my freedom. –Alessandra Stanley

6. You don't know a woman 'till you've met her in court. –Norman Mailer

7. You know why divorces are so expensive? Because they're worth it. –Willie Nelson

8. One thing I did learn is you don't hold on to the bitterness of the loss; you hang on to the beauty of the love. -–Eva Longoria

9. Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. -–Albert Einstein

10. When my dad divorced my mom it was kind of like him leaving me also. –Nicole Richie (as told to Oprah)

11. As one investor said in 2009, This is worse than divorce. I've lost half my net worth and I still have my wife. -–Warren Buffett

12. The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers. –Woody Allen

13. Just another of our many disagreements. He wants a no-fault divorce, whereas I would prefer to have the bastard crucified. –J.B. Handlesman

14. Marriage is grand. Divorce is twenty grand. –Jay Leno

15. A lot of people have asked me how short I am. Since my last divorce, I think I'm about $100,000 short. –Mickey Roon