divorce on the table

Is a Civil Divorce Possible? Here’s How to Keep Conversations Productive

divorce on the table

Heading into a divorce can be incredibly stressful, and all that stress can leave you and your spouse feeling less comfortable with the thought of negotiating with each other. However stressful the situation is, your Columbia divorce attorney is there to help you navigate the process as smoothly and civilly as possible. To that end, here are a few simple tips to help you keep conversations with your spouse civil and productive.

Try to Avoid Pointing Fingers

Unfortunately, blaming your spouse for everything going wrong can end up making divorce conversations more difficult. Instead of pointing fingers and blaming them for things that happened to trigger the divorce, try to remain calm. Blaming them for events or problems – even if those problems are the direct result of their actions – won’t make negotiations happen faster or go more smoothly. If you can’t talk to your spouse without anger, let your attorney help.

Keep Your Focus on the Big Picture

There are a lot of small details that need to be worked out during a divorce, and that makes it easy to get wrapped up in the nitty gritty. Try not to dwell on those tiny details. Instead, focus on the big picture and what you want your life to look like once the divorce is finalized. 

Prepare to Negotiate

It’s possible that you and your spouse will agree to all of the terms, but it’s not a guarantee. If you find that you disagree on who gets specific items or other details regarding your divorce, try not to become belligerent. Instead, try to remain calm and negotiate. Explain why a certain ask is so important to you, and listen to your spouse’s response. Often, it’s easier to reach an agreement when you open a dialogue and talk things through in a calm manner.

Consider Your Priorities

Before you start negotiating with your spouse and their attorney, create a list of the things that are important to you. Then, rank those items in order of most important to least important. This can help you target your negotiations and better identify the areas that you’re willing to compromise on. 

Forget the Ultimatums

When it comes to having a civil and amicable divorce, ultimatums need to be left at the door. You and your spouse are working to reach a resolution that’s fair and equitable, and that means you need to be prepared for some give and take. Remember, it always pays to take the high road and be the cool and collected party in the room. If your spouse is acting belligerently or keeps delivering ultimatums, your Columbia divorce attorney will be able to help guide the conversation and represent your interests.

You Can Have a Civil and Amicable Divorce

It’s possible to have a civil and amicable divorce even when you and your spouse are in complete disagreement over the terms. As long as you keep these tips in mind and work with an experienced Columbia divorce attorney, you’ll be able to navigate the process successfully.


If you’re ready to start divorce proceedings, contact Columbia Family Law Group, LLC today. Our experienced legal team will work with you to ensure a fair and equitable divorce.